As we are in green age, and as we see that there is a need to plan for the days ahead, pressure starts to build up in us. Perhaps we are well-prepared and there is not much problem financially speaking. But how to spend the time and how to live with family members day in and day out? These two are sources of pressure. The greatest worry is when we are not yet financially prepared for retirement but the age of retirement is fast coming. What should we do without an income? Or when our kids still have to depend on us, what should we do? There may seem to be something happening to our body, and we have no idea whether or not it is serious or not, and we do not want others to get worried. What should we do? When all these add up together, our emotion may be affected. If we do not face up to the situation, we may land into psychological or physiological diseases.

On the other hand, many people who have to take care of old folks in the family say that they are mentally and emotionally very disturbed. They do not know how to make themselves feel less depressed, nor do they know where to seek for help.

So first of all, we would like to share with you on how, under normal circumstances, to make ourselves feel better when we are emotionally disturbed.
  • We should understand, accept and face our emotions and we should not blame ourselves because we have tried our best.
  • If the emotional responses involve other people, such as the elderly folks we care about or those who take care of us, we should know how the other party feels and the hardship they face physically and mentally.
  • We should ask from ourselves according to our actual abilities and we should not set too high an expectation for ourselves and others. This will avoid a greater sense of frustration.
  • We should learn how a problem can be effectively solved and face problems boldly instead of avoiding them. For if not, the problems will only get worse. We can share our feelings with people whom we can trust and find an outlet for our pent-up emotion.
  • Always stay optimistic.
  • Learn various ways of self-relaxation, such as listening to music, taking deep breaths, meditation and so on.
  • Join more healthy social activities, build up an interpersonal network of support and improve your interpersonal relationship.
  • Reflect on whether or not you always say negative and insensible things such as “I will never make it”, “I am useless”, “No one will like me” and so on. Try to change these. Learn to appreciate yourself: Think you are good at something. Think more and give play to your talents.
  • If you find you that in a state of prolonged emotional disturbance, seek medical advice or go to a mental health comprehensive community centre for assistance.
There is nothing right or wrong about emotion and if only we can face it properly, it can become our drive. If you wish to know more about various emotional problems which you may encounter at the later stages in life, you may go to the section on “Sharing from Experts” and refer to a special feature written by Dr Gabriel Yu, a specialist in psychogeriatric, to know more about the causes of emotional problems and how to deal with them.

A discussion corner is found in this page and readers may share their experience there.

Related websites/articles
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  2. Department of Health, Elderly Health Service, coping with anxiety
  3. Mental Health Education, Castle Peak Hospital (Chinese version only)
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  5. Eason Chan Sings To Promote Mental Well Being. My Personal Sharing Too: Shall We Talk
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